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Apologizing Well
For anyone who over-apologizes, under-apologizes, or freezes when an apology is due. Each day is one small practice in owning a mistake plainly and repairing it, so apologies get simpler and relationships get steadier.
Communication · Communication · Relationships · one to-do a day · you choose how many days
The first seven days
- Day 1Count every time you say "sorry" before lunch today, using tally marks on a scrap of paper or your phone's notes.
- Day 2Swap one reflexive "sorry" for "thank you" today, such as "Thank you for waiting" instead of "Sorry I'm late."
- Day 3Write down, in one sentence, a small mistake you made this week, using "I" as the first word.
- Day 4Notice the next time you apologize for taking up space, like stepping aside in a hallway, and simply smile instead.
- Day 5Read an old text where you apologized and circle any words that were excuses rather than ownership.
- Day 6Tell someone at home one plain thing you got wrong this week, with no "but" after it.
- Day 7Before sending any email today, delete one unnecessary "sorry to bother you" and read how it sounds without it.
Further into the year
The to-dos keep changing as the year goes on. A few from later in this theme:
- Day 30Notice when you apologize to objects or pets out of habit, and let yourself laugh at it kindly.
- Day 60Wait until someone finishes speaking before you begin your apology, even if you want to jump in.
- Day 120Hand-deliver a small plant or treat to a friend you hurt, with a note that names what you did.
- Day 240Think of an apology you made that was really a request for reassurance, and notice how it felt afterward.
- Day 365Close out the week by writing one mistake, one repair, and one thing you'll carry forward.
How a challenge works
A Theraglee challenge is a theme with one small to-do for every day of a year. You choose how long yours runs, anywhere from a week to the full year, and each day you get the next to-do: something that takes a few minutes and fits inside an ordinary day. Tick it off when it is done. Nothing is scored and nothing is lost if you miss a day; the next to-do is simply waiting when you come back.
Challenges come with a free Theraglee account, which never asks for a card. Your progress stays private to you.