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Taking Criticism in Stride
For anyone who replays every critical comment for days or bristles before the other person has finished. Each day is one small practice in hearing feedback calmly, keeping what is useful, and letting the rest go.
Confidence · Self-Esteem · Resilience · Work · one to-do a day · you choose how many days
The first seven days
- Day 1Write down one critical comment you remember from the past month and, beside it, one thing in it that turned out to be true.
- Day 2The next time someone points out a mistake, take one slow breath before you say a single word.
- Day 3Let one person finish their whole sentence of feedback today before you start forming your reply.
- Day 4When a comment stings, ask one clarifying question, such as "Can you give me an example?", before you respond.
- Day 5Pick a critical remark you heard recently and write the point on one line and the tone on another.
- Day 6Say "Thanks for telling me" to the next person who offers you a correction, even a tiny one.
- Day 7Draw three columns on a page labeled useful, partly useful and not useful, and sort one recent piece of feedback into them.
Further into the year
The to-dos keep changing as the year goes on. A few from later in this theme:
- Day 30In a meeting, write down any critical comment word for word before reacting, so you can look at it calmly later.
- Day 60Write a short list of the words or phrases that tend to sting you most, so you can spot them when they come.
- Day 120Look back over this challenge so far and note one moment when you handled feedback more calmly than you once would have.
- Day 240Treat the next critique as a puzzle: what is the problem they see, and is there a fix you can try?
- Day 365Close today by naming one piece of feedback you are glad you heard, and one you are glad you let go.
How a challenge works
A Theraglee challenge is a theme with one small to-do for every day of a year. You choose how long yours runs, anywhere from a week to the full year, and each day you get the next to-do: something that takes a few minutes and fits inside an ordinary day. Tick it off when it is done. Nothing is scored and nothing is lost if you miss a day; the next to-do is simply waiting when you come back.
Challenges come with a free Theraglee account, which never asks for a card. Your progress stays private to you.